Are you someone's priority or someone's option?
I was someone's option in my past relationship but he was my priority. I had my world revolved around him and him being happy was my source of happiness, the only source. I used to wake up waiting for his texts, wait for him to make plans with me, wait for him to come back from whatever he was doing and hope that he would still remember my existence. Then he destroyed me.
Since then, I have promised myself to not be someone's option. I am not an object and I do not exist to fill in someone's time gap. I have feelings and I am going to protect them this time.
Sunday, January 8, 2012
Wednesday, January 4, 2012
Promises but not Resolutions
Have you noticed the many left-behind unfinished and underachieved resolutions that you have listed at the beginning of last year? The reason that they were still there by the end of 2011 was because they were only resolutions, not promises. 2011 is no longer in existence, so now stop judging yourself for what you had or had not done in the past, because you no longer live there.
Remember your past, but don't let it hold you down. For 2012, please do not make any more new year resolutions, make promises and keep them for yourself.
2011 was a very interesting year, things went quite... interesting. Then before you know it, 2012 is here. Remember the days that I used to cry on the train, cry at work, cry myself to sleep, wake up crying, and all my efforts go into trying to stop crying? I thought I would never see an end to this daily routine of pain. I was not hurt, I was destroyed.
I was destroyed but who says rebuilding is impossible? Well, I made it possible. I was on the ground, but I used my bare hand and pushed myself up again. I may still have scars all over me from the drop, I may still be covered in sand and dust, but I am standing.
And the first promise that I am making to myself this year is that, I will not say anything about myself that I would not want to come true. I will not call myself ugly, I will not call myself fat, and I will not call myself stupid, nor will I let anyone calling me any of these. I am pretty in my own way, I am healthy in my own size, and I am highly educated with a bright future in front of me.
The second promise that I am making, is to NEVER compare myself to other people. They may be skinnier, they may be prettier in whatever way, but hey, not everyone has a Master degree! Not everyone has shiny straight pretty hair! And lastly, not everyone has the dream that I am dreaming of.
The third promise that I am making, is to love myself and take responsibility of everything that has, and will, happen in my life. It will be my fault if I do not keep up with my studies and it will be my fault if I do not enter the school of my dream in 2013.
And of course, last but least, is to keep up with writing. I was told that I was a good writer, or at least a very creative one. I was told to never stop writing my thoughts down, but of course I stopped. I will try to keep up with blogging and writing short articles for 2012, and hopefully I will find my ideas of passion within this journey.
Remember your past, but don't let it hold you down. For 2012, please do not make any more new year resolutions, make promises and keep them for yourself.
2011 was a very interesting year, things went quite... interesting. Then before you know it, 2012 is here. Remember the days that I used to cry on the train, cry at work, cry myself to sleep, wake up crying, and all my efforts go into trying to stop crying? I thought I would never see an end to this daily routine of pain. I was not hurt, I was destroyed.
I was destroyed but who says rebuilding is impossible? Well, I made it possible. I was on the ground, but I used my bare hand and pushed myself up again. I may still have scars all over me from the drop, I may still be covered in sand and dust, but I am standing.
And the first promise that I am making to myself this year is that, I will not say anything about myself that I would not want to come true. I will not call myself ugly, I will not call myself fat, and I will not call myself stupid, nor will I let anyone calling me any of these. I am pretty in my own way, I am healthy in my own size, and I am highly educated with a bright future in front of me.
The second promise that I am making, is to NEVER compare myself to other people. They may be skinnier, they may be prettier in whatever way, but hey, not everyone has a Master degree! Not everyone has shiny straight pretty hair! And lastly, not everyone has the dream that I am dreaming of.
The third promise that I am making, is to love myself and take responsibility of everything that has, and will, happen in my life. It will be my fault if I do not keep up with my studies and it will be my fault if I do not enter the school of my dream in 2013.
And of course, last but least, is to keep up with writing. I was told that I was a good writer, or at least a very creative one. I was told to never stop writing my thoughts down, but of course I stopped. I will try to keep up with blogging and writing short articles for 2012, and hopefully I will find my ideas of passion within this journey.
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